A lot of my friends are having babies...surprisingly most of them are doing it on purpose. I am not ready for this next step in life...and I think it's showing in my responses when people are telling me that they are expecting a baby. Here, my friends, is a list of things that you shouldn't say when someone tells you that they are pregnant:
- Why?
- I'm sorry to hear that
- Whose is it?
- You're not going to name it something stupid like your parents did right?
- I hope it looks like your sister
- I thought you'd just gotten fatter
- Dibs!
- hahahahahahahaha!
- What if it's ugly?
- I'll still be your favourite though, right?
- So I guess you won't be drinking that bottle of wine I got you for your birthday...can I have it back?
- I hear pregnancy affects your sex life...how old is your husband's secretary?
- Lame!
- I didn't think you could get pregnant after all those scares in freshman year....
- Fine, but when you come over, the baby stays in the car
- Bet it's gonna be trippy finally feeling something come out of there for once
- Keepin it?
- By the time they're old enough to have kids of their own, humans will have killed the planet
- You're raising it Klingon right?
- Say goodbye to your good looks!
So....this may be why I don't get invited to a lot of baby showers...or because I got drunk and ordered strippers at the last one...
Either way...
White Girl Blogging
Friday 22 May 2015
Thursday 7 May 2015
A Complaint about Complainers
Wah wah wah....that's all we ever hear anymore. No matter what you do or what you say, someone complains. Everyone has something to complain about. Have you ever noticed though, that the people who complain the most are often the people who DO the least about it? Stop it. Grow up. Take responsibility. Take action.
People who whine about the government but don't vote. If you didn't care enough to make your voice heard when you were asked, don't whine like you care afterwards. The idea of democratic elections is to represent the people, so how can you then complain that the person in power isn't representing your views when you didn't even represent your own views?? Even if your candidate doesn't win, you still made your voice heard and count, sometimes one vote can make a difference. If you don't make your choice, you don't get to complain about the result, end of story.
People who complain about not being fit when they're eating an entire bag of chips. I complain about being fat a lot...but there is a difference is being upset about the result or being upset with yourself for not doing what you know you should. I used to complain about being fat but then scarf down a bag of chips and a 6-pack of beer and still wonder why the pounds weren't coming off. Nowadays I actually try, I try to eat right and I exercise...so when I complain, it's about the disappointment in myself, not that I'm owed anything. If you are actively trying to get fit and are struggling, go ahead and complain! It's hard work! But if you spend every day sitting on your ass on the couch eating nachos and drinking milkshakes....you don't get to complain until you get moving.
People who have everything done for them but complain about how it's done. This includes everything from kids complaining about how their mom does their laundry or you don't like how your spouse cleans the house. If someone is doing something for you, be grateful! If you really hate how it's done, do it yourself. Ok, this doesn't apply to surgeons, mechanics and other trained specialistz...in that case just find another one. But really, if you don't like the fabric softener I use, do your own laundry. If you don't like the hotels I booked, you plan the trip.
Anything teenagers complain about. Shut up. You know nothing about anything. You have no real world experience, you don't have to support yourself, nobody relies on you and you live in a selfish bubble. You have nothing to complain about that won't be over in 4-5 years tops.
People who complain about dating but who don't try. "It's so hard to meet someone"...are you trying online? No. Are you going out to social events 'No'....are you open to meeting different kinds of people "No, he/she has to look like Brad Pitt/Kim Kardashian and be perfect or I'm out". Ok...dating can suck sometimes, I concede that. My point is that most people don't really try. They go on 2 online dates and then can't understand why they haven't met their soul-mate. Or they look like an Orc but refuse to date anyone who doesn't look like a Calvin Klein model. Be open, be available, be someone you would want to date.
People who complain about the new sex-ed in Ontario. Please get your super conservative moron faces off of my news feed. Kids have always had sex-ed but it's so behind the time that what is currently being taught is barely relevant anymore. They will learn it from their friends and online...wouldn't you rather they have a decently built foundation of knowledge first? Are you really going to explain sexting to them? I doubt it.
People who complain about their job but work there for 30 years. Why? You spend a large chunk of your life at work, don't you want to be happy? Look for something better. Go back to school. Start some new initiatives to make it more enjoyable. Sitting there and being a miserable git isn't going to make the clock tick any faster or the job more enjoyable. After a certain amount of time of not doing anything about the problem...the problem becomes your own fault.
Nobody likes a whiner. If you have a problem, deal with it. If you can't fix it, at least do what you can to make it better. Or, at least have the decency to hide your misery behind alcoholism and leave the rest of us out of it. "Do you know who cares even less about your problems than you do?....Everybody".
If you're working at it, come complain to me all you want, you've earned it. If you are complaining because you think the world owes you something...I will personally slap you back to the Dark Ages.
People who whine about the government but don't vote. If you didn't care enough to make your voice heard when you were asked, don't whine like you care afterwards. The idea of democratic elections is to represent the people, so how can you then complain that the person in power isn't representing your views when you didn't even represent your own views?? Even if your candidate doesn't win, you still made your voice heard and count, sometimes one vote can make a difference. If you don't make your choice, you don't get to complain about the result, end of story.
People who complain about not being fit when they're eating an entire bag of chips. I complain about being fat a lot...but there is a difference is being upset about the result or being upset with yourself for not doing what you know you should. I used to complain about being fat but then scarf down a bag of chips and a 6-pack of beer and still wonder why the pounds weren't coming off. Nowadays I actually try, I try to eat right and I exercise...so when I complain, it's about the disappointment in myself, not that I'm owed anything. If you are actively trying to get fit and are struggling, go ahead and complain! It's hard work! But if you spend every day sitting on your ass on the couch eating nachos and drinking milkshakes....you don't get to complain until you get moving.
People who have everything done for them but complain about how it's done. This includes everything from kids complaining about how their mom does their laundry or you don't like how your spouse cleans the house. If someone is doing something for you, be grateful! If you really hate how it's done, do it yourself. Ok, this doesn't apply to surgeons, mechanics and other trained specialistz...in that case just find another one. But really, if you don't like the fabric softener I use, do your own laundry. If you don't like the hotels I booked, you plan the trip.
Anything teenagers complain about. Shut up. You know nothing about anything. You have no real world experience, you don't have to support yourself, nobody relies on you and you live in a selfish bubble. You have nothing to complain about that won't be over in 4-5 years tops.
People who complain about dating but who don't try. "It's so hard to meet someone"...are you trying online? No. Are you going out to social events 'No'....are you open to meeting different kinds of people "No, he/she has to look like Brad Pitt/Kim Kardashian and be perfect or I'm out". Ok...dating can suck sometimes, I concede that. My point is that most people don't really try. They go on 2 online dates and then can't understand why they haven't met their soul-mate. Or they look like an Orc but refuse to date anyone who doesn't look like a Calvin Klein model. Be open, be available, be someone you would want to date.
People who complain about the new sex-ed in Ontario. Please get your super conservative moron faces off of my news feed. Kids have always had sex-ed but it's so behind the time that what is currently being taught is barely relevant anymore. They will learn it from their friends and online...wouldn't you rather they have a decently built foundation of knowledge first? Are you really going to explain sexting to them? I doubt it.
People who complain about their job but work there for 30 years. Why? You spend a large chunk of your life at work, don't you want to be happy? Look for something better. Go back to school. Start some new initiatives to make it more enjoyable. Sitting there and being a miserable git isn't going to make the clock tick any faster or the job more enjoyable. After a certain amount of time of not doing anything about the problem...the problem becomes your own fault.
Nobody likes a whiner. If you have a problem, deal with it. If you can't fix it, at least do what you can to make it better. Or, at least have the decency to hide your misery behind alcoholism and leave the rest of us out of it. "Do you know who cares even less about your problems than you do?....Everybody".
If you're working at it, come complain to me all you want, you've earned it. If you are complaining because you think the world owes you something...I will personally slap you back to the Dark Ages.
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